Last Saturday out here in greater San Francisco land, my wife, daughter and I drove from the mid-Peninsula up through Sonoma Wine Country to attend a wedding in Kenwood. After 80 minutes of traffic heaven got us to the other side of the Golden Gate Bridge, we came upon a MINI Cooper with a large cardboard plackard attached to its rear bumper. From a few car lengths away, all one could see was a giant red STOP sign. As we got closer the bold black type underneath became legible. It read “Trump Now!”
I immediately thought to myself that this kind of behavior duplicated widely is a sure-fire way to ensure Mr. Trump’s ascendancy to the presidency. I know the dying news media cannot help themselves in their obsession with Trump. They need the eyeballs and know that more Trump coverage is the way to get it. Do I think if they ignored him, he’d pretty much go away? Yes I do.
By way of explanation, I am one of those so-called whack jobs who believes strongly in the Law of Attraction – that what you think about is what you bring about. There are a lot of us cult-like followers in your midst. We just keep our mouths shut nearly all of the time in order to not subject ourselves to ridicule or incarceration.
But wait, I’m going to get weirder on you. I am absolutely convinced the universe doesn’t recognize the terms ‘no,’ ‘stop,’ or ‘war on,’ among other expressions that convey what we are against versus what we are for. When we repeatedly say, “Stop gun violence now!” the universe hears GUN VIOLENCE. When we repeatedly yell, “War on drugs!,” the universe hears DRUGS. When we gain a few pounds and repeatedly exclaim we want to “lose fat,” the universe hears FAT. When we repeatedly complain, “I am poor,” the universe hears POOR. In all these cases, the very thing we don’t want is inevitably what we get more of.
“What you think about expands. If your thoughts are centered on what’s missing, then what’s missing, by definition, will have to expand.” – Wayne Dyer
Yes, I know. Weird, weird, weird. But I believe this to be true. In fact I am convinced it IS a law.
So what are we to do in order to work with and not against this ‘law?’ Instead of focusing on what we don’t want or on what we’re fighting against, we can simply emphasize what it is we do want with clarity. Instead of using the term ‘gun violence,’ we can declare a manifesto for peace on our streets. Instead of vilifying drugs, we can herald an era of clean living. Instead of bemoaning our fat, we can laser-focus our minds on becoming lean and mean.
Lest you are thinking I’m talking about the often-criticized adoration several years ago with “The Secret,” not for a second am I expressing any credence toward a belief you can simply visualize each day for a year about owning a Tesla Model S, and POOF, the Tesla – complete with ‘Auto-Pilot’ and a pre-installed home charger – will appear in your driveway. Nope, this is about setting aggressive positive goals, taking massive amounts of action, getting comfortable with extensive delays of gratification, and course-correcting as we march along our merry ways.
While we’re going down Strange Avenue, I don’t believe opposites attract, just as I don’t think that focusing on what you don’t want or on what you fear yields any type of ‘success’ in getting what you do want. People often laugh at how my wife and I couldn’t be more different, yet they have never heard the two of us discuss our aligned values, nor listened to our frequent conversations on shared passions like personal development and spirituality.
As another example, let’s talk about that wedding we attended up in wine country. It was alcohol free. The food served was vegetarian only. In attendance among people of every age were a range of spiritual seekers, successful small business entrepreneurs, and an extremely large Italian family. Everyone seemed to be healthy, at peace, happy, and wishing nothing but the best for the bride and groom. Yes, I know it was a wedding after all. But I have rarely attended a large gathering with a happier and mellower vibe emanating from a herd of more like-minded people. I’ll admit that initially breaking the ice without the pleasurably numbing effects of booze was a bit disconcerting. But the resulting dinner conversations were deeper and more meaningful.
And as far as Donald Trump is concerned, I’m not focusing on him at all. I don’t read articles about him, watch TV coverage on him, get involved with discussions or debates about him, et cetera. And by now I’m hoping you know why. To repeat, it’s because this attraction thing is a law. Got it? Get it? Good. Now let’s focus on what we want. End of sermon.
FOOTNOTE: Check out how this ‘law’ operates in your workplace. Observe who hangs out with whom, what the topics of discussion are among different groups of people such as those colleagues who aren’t engaged in their job, who the highest performers hang with and who they tend to avoid. At your j-o-b as in everywhere else, the ‘law’ of like attracting like is always in operation. The more aware you are of this, the better armed you will be to become more intentional in your thoughts, behaviors and actions in order to make this principle work for you.